so many things happening rite now... at wk and in personal.
wk - lots of issues keeping up from customer sides... my collegues facing lots of stress... and i'm stuck in the middle. i understand both sides' pt of view... but the stress they are receiving seems to be from the same source... i really feel for my poor dear collegue... she really going nuts... i mean there are only a amt of stress one can handle. the pay here is nt fantastic... the only things tat keep us here are the other collegues.. she is really so so tired of the things she needs to face. everything was juz dump in her lap... and no one can help her... she has to clear the shit herself... sighz... later have to go face 2 customer... my salesguy juz keep shaking his head at the thot.... sighzz... i mean we keep have arguements over small issues... it is not v healthy... sighzz
personal - lots of stuff going thru my mind rite now... seems all my hard wk went to waste... tat's the feeling tat i am getting... everytime one of my frds get married i have this feeling... which woman dun want a happy family... so tired of waiting for the outcome... but on the other hand i am also afraid to take things into my own hands... gt nag by galfrds... i noe they really care for me and wants the best for me... nt really sure hw to handle this.. this is juz me... always the indecisive one... i dunoe whether to believe in wat he says... i really dunoe... who doesn't hope tat their current relationship to wk out?? especially if hard wk was put in? he keep saying he did alot... i really dun see it at all... he keep saying he is tolerating me... who has the worse temper... is him not me... who is tolerating who??? he is too hot n cold towards me... more cold den hot... i nid someone i can lean on... someone more protective of me... someone who actually worries for me... haha... i seems so sure abt wat i want but dunoe hw to react to the current situation... stupid rite... he can tell me... i want someone who can take care of me... yo hooo... u are a guy... i did my best to do wat u want me to do... he did try also i tink... but...is usually for short term only... pretty fast will go back to his normal self... mayb this is hw he is... is either i accept or let go... many pple on the surface think we are so darn stable... cos together for many yrs... he himself say we are unstable... i really cannt believe it... so hurting.. so many yrs already...
